Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
