I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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