we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
