Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
