What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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