Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
