you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
