im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize