I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
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