And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
my being single is dangerous.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
