I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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