my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
