Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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