i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
