check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
