my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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