WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize