Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
