quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
