so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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