You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
we made out on top of his cat.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
