i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
