STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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