I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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