found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Randomize
