May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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