I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize