just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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