dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
