haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
