I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
