Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
