Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.