dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Just cropdusted the office
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.