I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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