We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
