I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize
