Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
My nipple is on Facebook.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
