I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
