i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
