It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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