Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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