i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
zippers are such a cool invention
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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