you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Randomize