Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
