Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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