last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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