He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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