What a fucking waste of an outfit
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Randomize