just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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