she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
