Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
